at Thursday, April 15, 2010 Posted by Lisa Best

The title sums it up.

I am accident prone. No matter the setting, circumstances or activity, I will find a way to spill, knock-over, bump-in-to, trip, drop, throw or break something. In the past week I have stubbed my toe multiple times, spilled a full Dr. Pepper all over my Fiance (for the 2ND time unfortunately... honey, you are a patient fella), stepped on and broke an earring, spilled my juice, spilled my water, spilled my __________ (fill in the blank with any beverage & I bet you I probably spilled it.), ripped a beloved t-shirt after dripping chocolate sauce on it, burned my arm with the iron (while simultaneously knocking over a beverage. double fail), tracked some mysterious black ink onto my work carpet, poured Diet Coke down my shirt, (I apparently missed my mouth), tripped in public & awkwardly began skipping, so people would think I was skipping, rather than thinking I tripped. As if a 23 year old woman skipping while in public is more socially acceptable than tripping over my shoe. Shoulda taken the tumble with pride, knowing that at least I hadn't been caught skipping for no apparent reason.

Anyway, I am accident-prone. And I can't help it. The scary thing is, I have gotten better! Baby steps to being a normal-functioning, careful, cautious adult. One who does not require a bib. It was ok to be clumsy when I was young, blame it on my age & my awkward, lanky, growing body. But that only lasted as an excuse for so long. At some point you realize that you are responsible for more spills in your house than your four-year old step-son. Is it ok that I secretly blame him every once and a while? Ok, I'm kidding, I'm way more mature than that. WAY. Am so!

But seriously, I need to work on it. I refuse to one day hear from one of my children "Mom you spilled
again?, do we need to get you a sippy cup?" or "Mom, how many times do I have to tell you to not run in the house?" I can see it now.
Then I'd say "you're not the boss of ME! "
Then I'd threaten that I was going to ship them to boarding school to keep them quiet.
Then i'd cry hysterically and hold them to my chest and tell them I didn't mean what I said, buy them an ice-cream cone & tell them they were my favorite. And give them $20.
And then, when Brett came home, I'd probably blame the spill on one of them. Just because I can. And because I really spill a lot, so I think Brett will appreciate it if I switch up the culprit, to avoid a repetitiveness in spill-related scolding. Aren't I thougtful?

And that is how that will all go down in the future. Any questions?

I'm a loser.

Welcome to adult life Lisa. We hope you enjoy your stay.


  1. Wow, you did it! you refered to Will as your "4 year old step son" Has is sunk in yet? 2 days until it's official! He's lucky to have an awesome {even if you are clumsy} "step" mom.

    Good thing your so awesome that all those clumsy moments dont matter and people (namely Will and Brett) just smile at you.

    no more burns though! those hurt!

  1. I love you Lisa!!! I'm so glad I got to see you. I didn't see you clumsily stumble over anything while I was there, so if you hadn't said anything, I never would have known. Think twice before you post this stuff.
    I love love love you.

  1. I burned myself right before my wedding, too. Must be good luck!