I woke up today after a horrible nights rest.
Today's sleep-deprived delight of a woman has been brought to you by the following sponsors:
Our first sponsor:
1. Allergy season is approaching... Wanna know how I know? Here, listen... (*a nose in distress is heard, an unattractive and distracting wheezing escapes with each breath for dear life* too dramatic? ;)) The allergy supplied not one, but 2 stuffed nostrils. I have prepared the following equation to help break this down:
1 stuffed nostril + another stuffed nostril = zero correctly functioning nostrils remaining.
... That involuntary whistlin' tune coming from my nose is slowly causing me insane. I'm slowly slipping away. I remind myself of that annoying kid on Hey Arnold who used to lurk over Helgas shoulder. Anyone know what in the heck I am talking about?
"Jam Factor of 10 is the severity of my nose traffic. (Brett that was for you :)
Ok, enough about my stuffy nose, my this is an exciting post.
Moving right along...
Sponsor #2, come on down:
That *time* of the month is here. Waaaahhh.
Must I elaborate any more on that? Cause I'll punch yer lights out if I am asked anything further. (Whoa, sorry, I didn't mean that...)
How come my once-a-month payday takes what feels like decades to arrive each month, and leaves before I can even prepare myself for another months wait, While my *time*, who's visits are identical in recurring frequency to my monthly paycheck somehow show up 50 times faster, set up camp, and toss any evidence of my pleasant self in a closet to make way for a crazy heap of mood swings that are consistent in only one way: There will be crying involved.
I miss my nice self when shes gone. She's off being pleasant somewhere, no doubt enjoying clear nasal passageways, a stable mood & a bag of cheetos.
So, the two-fold list of negatives I have shared above, were very much active this morning while I was getting ready for work. I was whistlin out my nose and yelling profanities at my mean self for no apparent reason. It was just one of those mornings that you know leaving the house is not in anyone's best interest, as society would not benefit from your participation in this particular day. But, unfortunately for society, I have to go to work so that the aforementioned paycheck will continue its scheduled arrival that I so eagerly await each month. I lead an exciting life, I am aware.
So I threw on the first outfit I saw, which didn't actually go together, but as I said it's been one of those mornings. Plus, I struggle with things like fashion, color coordination, the ability to determine a cute outfit from a "what not to wear" worst outfit winner. And I'm ok with that because a well styled look is not expected of me. And why rock that boat? It gives me an excuse for why I am wearing what I am wearing today. And I am not asked for an explanation, because one mismatched out fit today is no different than the odd pairing yesterday, or the sandals, skirt and sweatshirt look that I graced Monday with.
Am I still talking about this? Moving on... I walked out the door, feeling lousy and fully ready to punch Thursday in the forehead, when I saw a little bag of candy and this sitting on my car seat:
And I punched myself in the forehead and laughed.
A quickly written, unexpected, straight from the heart note
And just like that, everything was right with the world
And society is safe once again.
I really like my Fiancee. Like, like. Like more than a friend. He is my mood swing medium... the only one who can bring me back to center, simply by being himself. And that is one reason why my life is really, really good.
